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Young and Beautiful

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After yesterday's breaking news, I did not bother with the usual Femulatee and Femulator spots. To make up for it, I proffer you nine photos from flickr of an unknown scholastic womanless beauty pageant.

Starla alerted me to the photos. We were both very impressed with the quality of the femulations and suspect that some of the girls may not be civilians.

Without further ado, here are the beauties.










Workplace Rights

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Despite major wins within the LGBTQ community in recent years, many transgender and non-conforming gender individuals feel there’s still a lot more to do in the fight for equality both in and out of the office.

Here is a helpful guide for transgender workers, from new graduates just entering the workforce to seasoned working professionals, as well as employers and hiring managers. Learn more about current transgender workplace rights, how to navigate some of the biggest workplace and job hunting concerns, and see what employers can do to lay the foundation for safe and inclusive work environments.

Transgender and non-conforming gender (TGNC) individuals are protected by policies and laws intended to eliminate harassment and discrimination. While some protections are at the federal level, many states, counties, and cities have their own policies in place. “Protection laws differ from state to state, so it’s important that you check the state in which you work,” notes Dr. Kristie Overstreet, a clinical sexologist and psychotherapist who specializes in transgender identities.

Where I live (Connecticut), we have been protected for some time. My former company had policies in place even before the state and my Human Resources representative was ready and willing to help me to transition into a working woman whenever I was ready. I was also greeted with open arms when I inquired about working as a woman at a local Dress Barn. That's Connecticut and your mileage may vary depending on where you live, so check out the Workplace Guide and see where you stand.




Source: Ann Taylor
Wearing Ann Taylor (Source: Ann Taylor)




Benjamin Koldyke
Benjamin Koldyke femulating in television's Work It!

Sunday Afternoon

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One week has passed since my last posting here. Since then, I have received e-mails wondering why the lapse and if I am OK.

I assure you that all is well and I am just enjoying my first care-free summer since 1967.

Two Sundays ago, the other women in this abode attended a bridal shower. I was not invited since the people doing the inviting were not aware that I am a woman, too. So I had the whole afternoon to myself.

It was hot and humid, so I dressed appropriately. Since losing weight, I don't need all the shapewear I needed in the past, which is a blessing in this weather. I just wore a waist cincher to add some curvature to my figure.

I wore my last Dress Barn purchase again because it is perfect for summer weather. It is sleeveless, collarless and made of a light and airy material.

After dressing, but before departing, I took the dogs out to do what they had to do. One pass up and down our long driveway is all that is required, but I have never done it in broad daylight (pun intended). Two cars drove by and since we live on a dead end, they were likely neighbors not not strangers passing through, but I doubt if they recognized me.

My day out was uneventful.

I shopped at a relatively new Dress Barn store and was welcomed by a pretty sales rep, who immediately recognized the dress I was wearing and complimented me on my outfit. I tried on a few things, but I did not find anything that I wanted to buy.

Then I went to my favorite Chinese restaurant where I had dined in boy mode with the family just a few weeks ago. The waiter, who is also the owner and the same person who waited on us during our previous visit, seated me and did not seem to recognize me. He referred me as "Miss" throughout the hour I spent at the restaurant and did not blink an eye when I went to the ladies' room before departing.

I drove home, took the dogs out again and then decompressed after a pleasant Sunday afternoon as my true self.




Source: Moda Operandi
Wearing Moda Oprandi (Source: Moda Operandi)



Boy-Girl-Boy, Halloween 1978
Boy-Girl-Boy, Halloween 1978

Just for Halloween?

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Hello Stana,

I have a couple of queries regarding your "fancy dress" work appearances (which iI'm guessing is some kind of white-collar environment):

1 - Don't your colleagues ask you (well, at least female ones anyway, as men might think their masulinity and/or sexuality might be questioned in some way if they did): How come you seem to be very good at turning yourself into a woman and enquire as to if there might be a bit more to it than the occasional halloween appearance?

2 - Do all (or even any) of your female colleagues dress so smartly and glamourously for work? I suspect not in this day and age, where even most offices allow casual wear (which means it's far more likely trousers are worn rather than skirts and dresses).

Yours,

Gina V

👠👠👠

Hi Gina,

1 - Believe it or not, no one, male or female, has ever asked. Some have made humorous comments and some have complimented me on my appearance. I can only recall one snarky comment: one fellow wonderers how I just happened to have all the makings of my costume just for Halloween, inferring that I dressed on other occasions, too.  

2 - There were about 15 females in my office (about 60 males). About half the women are engineers or programmers and they dress casually. The other half are office workers and they dress like office girls. Some (like me) dress nicer than others, so I definitely fit in with the office girls.

Halloween is less than three months away. Although I am semi-retired, some of my former co-workers asked if I would visit them en femme on October 31.

I said I would.



Source: Intermix
Wearing Caroline Constas top, Jonathan Simkhai dress and Giuseppe Zanotti sandals (Source: Intermix)




Bryan Boy
Fashion blogger Bryan Boy femulates Vogue editor Anne Wintour, Halloween 2014

Who did your makeup?

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Diane commented on my Just for Halloween? post:

One time my wife and I went to a costume party and everybody said I looked too good not to have dressed before. I would have thought someone would ask about how much clothes do you have and how are you so good at makeup.

No co-worker has ever asked me about the quantity of womenswear in my closet, however, my makeup acumen has raised the curiosity of more than one female co-worker.

Typically, they have asked if my wife did my makeup. My reply is that I did my own makeup because there was no way that my wife was going to get up at 5 AM to do make up my face. (By the way, my wife stopped wearing makeup about 15 years ago and even when she did, she would ask me to help because I was more expert at applying makeup than she was.)

When I replied, I did my makeup, sometimes they asked if they could have a closer look. When I said, "Go for it," they got up real close to give my makeup the once-over. They usually complimented me with comments like "You do your makeup better than I do" or "Can you give me some makeup lessons?" or "You could be a female impersonator."

And so it goes.




Source: Boston Proper
Wearing Boston Proper (I love this dress! Source: Boston Proper)




Alex Ringler and Marty Thomas
Alex Ringler and Marty Thomas femulating on stage in Pageant: The Musical.

Top 20!

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I was very surprised to receive an email this morning informing me that my blog had been selected by Feedspot as one of the Top 100 Transgender Blogs on the web. I was even more surprised when I checked the Top 100 list to discover that Femulate was in the number 20 slot! Wow – what an honor!

FYI, Feedspot uses the following criteria to rank blogs from the thousands of top transgender blogs in their index using search and social metrics:

👠 Google reputation and Google search ranking

👠 Influence and popularity on Facebook, twitter and other social media sites

👠 Quality and consistency of posts

👠 Feedspot’s editorial team and expert review

And so it goes!



Source: Matches Fashion
Wearing Miu Miu (Source: Matches Fashion)



Grayson Perry
Kate Middleton and Grayson Perry discussing the ideal corseted waistline for femulating.

Internet helped her be herself

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“I learned that I wasn’t alone. I learned about all these different life possibilities and options.” —Chelsea Manning on how the Internet helped her be herself.

Read the rest of Chelsea's story in the September issue of Voguehere.




Source: Boston Proper
Wearing Boston Proper (Source: Boston Proper)




Adam Bailey
Adam Bailey femulating on the UK stage in Taboo.

A Few Feminine Things

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Do you remember the early Beatles?

Their hair was so long by 1964 standards that I was sure it was the beginning of the end of gender as we knew it. That boys would all be wearing long, girlish hairdos before long and as one thing led to another, boys would be dressing like girls, too.

Wishful thinking?

Boy's hairdos did get longer and the lads' hair length rivaled the ladies. And boys dressed more flamboyantly – not quite dressing exactly like girls, but definitely adopting items from milady's closet, as epitomized in a 1973 issue of Mad magazine.





Wearing Tibi (Source: Shopbop)




Brian Charles Rooney
Brian Charles Rooney femulates on the Broadway stage in Miss Blanche Tells It All.

Feminine Mail

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In today's mail, there was a wig catalog from Paula Young, an advertisement from Dress Barn and the September issue of Elle all addressed to a boy named Stan.

Every day, I receive mail with a feminine bent addressed to my boy name. The reason being is that over the years, I have ordered various feminine paraphernalia using a credit card account that is in my male name.

That being the case, I often wondered what goes through the mind of the person delivering the mail.

Here in the foothills of the Berkshires, our mail person typically lasts about ten years before he or she gets a different route. As a result, he/she has the opportunity over a decade to get familiar with the type of mail delivered to my address.

I don't know any mail persons personally, so I cannot ask if this is something that they notice or are they so busy delivering the goods that they don't have time to consider the evidence.

Maybe if one day, I met the mail person at our mailbox dressed to the nines, he might recall my feminine bent mail and put two and two together, but until then, who knows?



Source: Eloquii
Wearing Eloquii (Source: Eloquii)




Prep Time
Prep Time

Rest in Peace, Holly Boswell

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I met Holly Boswell at Fantasia Fair. Her reputation preceded her and I was in awe of Holly. Being a shy girl, I admired her from afar.

Yesterday, I learned that Holly died on August 12. She was only 66 years old and left us too early.

Jennifer Barge wrote a letter to the Asheville, NC, Mountain Xpress announcing Holly's death and describing her life as a transgender activist. Click here to read Jennifer's letter.

God Bless You, Holly.




Source Matches Fashion
Wearing Miu Miu (Source Matches Fashion)




Alena
Alena

If I Only Had A Butt

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Yesterday's daily e-mail advertisement from ModCloth included a swimsuit that I immediately recognized. So, who wore it better... Chelsea Manning or the ModCloth model?

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I have an anti-J.Lo butt.

Head-on, I look curvaceous, but from the side or rear, not so much because my butt is as flat as the Great Plains. Instead of the Great Plains, I would prefer the rolling Berkshire Hills.

If any of you were in the same boat and successfully corrected the problem, I would love to hear how you did it. (I'd like to wear a swimsuit like Chelsea, but first I need a butt!)



Source: Tory Burch
Wearing Tory Burch (Source: Tory Burch)




Brian Deacon
Brian Deacon femulates in the 1972 British film The Triple Echo.

Fantasia Fair Blues

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It is that time of year. A couple of girls asked me if I was going to Fantasia Fair this year. My response is that I would love to go, but I cannot to leave my multiple sclerosis'd wife at home alone for a week or even a half-week.

Their retort is bring my wife to the Fair.

Her MS does not permit her to walk very far for very long and visiting Provincetown is all about walking. The venues for the various Fantasia Fair events are all over town and my wife is in no condition to trek up and down Commercial Street for a full week or a half-week. (I guess there is something to be said for those trans conventions that are held within the confines of a high rise hotel.)

I could get away for a day or two and I would be willing to pay for the privilege of attending the a Fair for a couple of days, but a whole week or a half-week are the only options available for attending.

I could pay for a half-week and only attend one or two days, but having just entered the ranks of the Socially Secured, I am loathe to spend $390 for one or two days at the Fair (which does not include a hotel room).

Some girls I know go to Provincetown during the Fair without paying. They attend the free daily  keynote addresses and pay for admission to the fashion show and follies, but they miss everything else.

I could do that too, but I don't want to miss everything else and I feel like I would be cheating the Fair, so I will not go.




Source: Bebe
Wearing Bebe (Source: Bebe)




Jun Pham
Jun Pham femulates on the Vietnamese version of Your Face Sounds Familiar (2017)
(Thank you, Cheryl)

Clerk won't sell clothes to transwoman

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After another roller coaster week with the President, this segment of What Would You Do? restored my faith in humanity, at least for a brief moment.

But I wonder, does this ever happen in this day and age?

I have been shopping for women's clothing for nearly 50 years (in boy and girl mode) and have never had an encounter like this. The worst thing that ever happened to me was eons ago, when a JCPenney saleswoman asked me (in boy mode) to use the men's changing room to try on a girdle. Other than that, every salesperson I have encountered was very helpful and encouraged me to try on anything and everything (and spend my money).




Source: Dress Barn
Wearing Dress Barn (Source: Dress Barn)




Paula
Paula

Got Butt

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Last week, I was whining here about my flat butt. I decided to do something about it, so after some googling, I found an inexpensive solution: a pair of drop-shaped silicone pads. Amazon has them for $23.99, so I ordered a pair along with some lingerie tape to hold them in place.

Amazon Prime delivered my order in two days and I tried the pads on as fast as I could strip down and redress.

I am happy to report that I now have a shapely butt. The Great Plains are now the rolling Berkshire Hills!

It remains to be seen how my new butt fares during a full day out as a woman. I will let you know.




Source: Boston Proper
Wearing Boston Proper (Source: Boston Proper)




2016 Menlo College Drag Show
Femulating in the 2016 Menlo College Drag Show.

Hear Ye, Hear Ye, Hear Me

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If you attended a transgender convention and I was on the bill as a speaker, what would you like me to talk about?

My friend Alison suggested that I spend one day attending the three-day First Event in lieu of attending the week-long Fantasia Fair. And while I am at, why not present a talk on something near and dear to our hearts (assuming that the First Event organizers would have me).

I asked Alison what she would like me to talk about and she responded, "I'd say there's quite a number of topics that you could do presentations on: certainly makeup, fashions tips and shopping. There are lots of newbies who attend First Event who would love that. And there's some heavier stuff, like dressing in the workplace and navigating family relationships, dressing in Dayton and, of course, blogging."

In the past, I've done presentations titled "Makeup Basics for Trans Females,""Top 30 Things Every Crossdressing Man Needs In His Wardrobe To Emulate A Woman" and "What To Do When You Are Out and About."

Those are some topics to consider, but I was wondering if there is anything we missed. If you have a topic you would like me to cover, let me know by leaving a comment below or sending me an email via stana-stana @ sbcglobal.net. If I don't cover your topic at First Event, I may cover it here on the blog.




Source: Intermix
Wearing Alexia romper and Khokha bag (Source: Intermix)




Miguel Oyola
Miguel Oyola femulates Paulina Rubio on Panama television's Your Face Sounds Familiar.

The Perils of Femulating

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Source: Intermix
Wearing Iro dress and Jimmy Choo sandals (Source: Intermix)




Pawel Jasionowski
Pawel Jasionowski femulates Urszula on Polish television's Your Face Sounds Familiar. 

Let's Go Out

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Going out for the first time is a very big step in the life of a femulator.

When I grew tired of the closet, I wanted to go out en femme, but I was very apprehensive. After years of practice in the closet, I thought my dress, hair and makeup were passable, but my size worried me.

I did go out en femme to Halloween parties about a half dozen times and those experiences should have given me confidence about my femulating abilities. In each case, I dressed in "office girl drag" and at three of those Halloween parties, strangers asked about me – they wanted to know, "Who is the woman not in costume?" Yet, I still shrank away from going out en femme because I thought my size would expose me as a faux female.

After about 20 years of femulating in the closet and out on Halloween, I joined a support group (Connecticut Outreach Society) that met 30 minutes away via the interstate. The group provided the option to dress at their meeting hall if desired, but I dressed at home and drove to the hall en femme. Perhaps, my Halloween experiences had emboldened me enough so that I did not fear driving en femme without the safety net of October 31.

I was a regular attendee of the support group's meetings and eventually was on their board of directors, edited their newsletter and organized their annual banquets. Today, I am their membership chairwoman, but I am getting ahead of myself.

In addition to the annual banquet, about once a year, my support group had an outing – usually to a restaurant where we were ensconced in a separate dining room so as not to scare the civilians. I did not cotton much to those arrangements, but it was better than nothing and it did give me an opportunity to mix with the civilian staff of the restaurant and any civilian customers that I might encounter entering or exiting the establishment. And being a rebellious sort, I always used the civilian restroom instead of the bathroom assigned to us girls in order to mix it up with the civilians.

In retrospect, those outings don't seem like much, but they were baby steps in the right direction.




Source: Bebe
Wearing Bebe (Source: Bebe)




Karl-Erik Taukar
Karl-Erik Taukar femulates Dana International on Estonian television's Your Face Sounds Familiar.
SaveSave

Let's Go Out Again

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My previous post (Let's Go Out) described my early baby steps out of the closet en femme, going to Halloween parties and attending my support group meetings and its rare outings where brief encounters with civilians were always a possibility.

I wanted more, but I still feared that my size would out me. I attended a few trans conventions, which were typically held in high-rise hotels. In those scenarios, there was a greater chance to mix with the civilians, but in truth, the hotels were just a bigger closet than the one at home or at the hall where my support group met.

One of my friends dragged me out of the hotel to shop or dine. Although I looked passable, those were deer-in-the-headlight moments. I acted like a man in a dress in fear of being found out rather than acting like a natural born woman. As a result, I was read right and left.

I retreated to the closets where I felt more comfortable and I became even more active in my support group editing their newsletter and running their annual banquet. The latter probably helped me a lot because I had to deal with civilians who ran the hotel where we held our banquets. In boy mode, I would contact the banquet person at the hotel and meet with her to arrange the event. In doing so, I was admitting to a civilian that I was trans and guess what? The world did not end and the news did not phase her one iota!

As I became more active, the need to go out increased. Finally, I had to do something, so one day, I dressed to shop (sweater tunic, leggings, booties, etc) and drove to West Farms Mall. I sat in my car for almost a half hour before I could overcome my fear and push myself out of my car and into the mall.

As an average looking, middle-aged woman, I was invisible shopping in the mall. No one paid any attention to me except for the sales people trying to sell me their wares. If any sales person figured me out, he or she did not indicate the discovery and treated me as the woman I portrayed. And guess what? The world did not end and my presence in the mall did not phase the civilians one iota.

The flood gates were now open and I began going out with great abandon. I attended a four-day workshop in Manhattan as a woman, I started doing outreach at colleges and universities as a woman,  I began attending ham radio events as a woman, I attended my law school reunion as a woman, etc. Whenever I went out without my family, I went out as a woman.

And guess what? The world did not end and my presence in the world as a woman did not phase the civilians one iota.




Source: Veronica Beard
Wearing Veronica Beard (Source: Veronica Beard)




Miguel Bosé
Miguel Bosé femulating in the 1991 Spanish film High Heels.

Let's Go Out One More Time

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Just some thoughts and comments regarding the previous two posts Let's Go Out and Let's Go Out Again.

👠 👠 👠

Julie Shaw commented, "It took me a NUMBER of years to venture out, but now I kick myself for not going out earlier."

Same here. I so regret the years wasted in the closet. I can't urge girls enough not to hesitate and go out and enjoy the world as the woman you really are as soon as you can.

👠 👠 👠

Paula Goodwin commented, "My first step truly outside the closet... I decided that if I didn't wear my glasses I would be harder to recognise."

Your mileage may vary, but I need eyeglasses for long distance, particularly for driving and for short distances (reading and computing). In between, my vision is good enough that I can get away without wearing eyeglasses, so when I am out as a woman, I don't wear them except to drive and read..

In boy mode, I wear eyeglasses almost all the time, so I feel very confident that folks who know the boy me will not recognize the girl me. And more than one encounter in girl mode with civilians who know the boy me, confirm the eyeglass strategy (as can be seen here).

And as they say, "Boys don't make passes at girls who wear glasses." I think I look more attractive without eyeglasses and you probably do, too.




Source: Boston Proper
Wearing Boston Proper (Source: Boston Proper)




Filip Dizdar
Filip Dizdar femulates Tajči on Croatian television's Your Face Sounds Familiar.

What did you do in the war, Daddy?

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When Bombardier Arthur Butler of the 122nd Field Regiment Royal Artillery transformed himself into Gloria D’Earie she became ‘exquisite’. She made all her own costumes and moved and spoke just like a woman. Butler was a professional female impersonator and widely regarded as the best in Changi. His act was so convincing that some men found it too painful: they would rather not be reminded of what a woman looked like as it made their separation from wives and sweethearts harder to bear. (Source: The Barbed-Wire University: The Real Lives of Prisoners of War in the Second World War by Midge Gillies)




Source: HauteLook)
Wearing Rebecca Minkoff (Source: HauteLook)
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