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The 27%

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27% Of Americans Wouldn't Want To Be Friends With A Transgender Person

"A survey by YouGov of more than 2,000 participants found that 27% of respondents were not open to being friends with anyone who identifies as transgender , even though around 40% said they personally know someone who is trans." (Source: Refinery29)

I wonder how many of the 27% have transgender friends and don't know it. 

I wonder how they would answer the survey if a friend came out as transgender.

Most of my friends are still friends after I came out to them as transgender. The only friend I lost was actually my wife's friend, so she was my friend by marriage. Anyway, she dropped us like a hot potato when my wife mentioned that I was trans.

And so it goes.




Source: Harpers Bazaar
Wearing Lagos (Source: Harpers Bazaar)



Victoria Elizabeth
Victoria Elizabeth, UK Comedy Magician, Actress and Entertainer

Waiting for the other shoe to drop

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Everyday, Payless sends me an email advertisement. Wednesday's ad contained the following image of footwear for sale at their store. Notice that the images were clearly labeled "SHOP WOMEN" so customers would not mistaken the practical, virile ladies' styles as men's footwear.


I wonder when my daily Payless missives will contain an image like the following — footwear for sale at their stores clearly labeled "SHOP MEN" so customers would not mistaken the impractical, dainty gentlemen's styles as women's footwear. 






Source: Eloquii
Wearing Eloquii (Source: Eloquii)




Michal Rudas
Michal Rudas femulates Shania Twain singing my theme song Man! I Feel Like A Woman on a 2016 episode of Polish television's Your Face Sounds Familiar (Twoja Twarz Brzmi Znajomo).

Halloween Redux

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Back to the Bank


I went to my bank yesterday to withdraw money to buy groceries. This is the same bank I visited on Halloween en femme.

The teller (Miss K) was the first woman I saw walking into the bank last week. The other two women staffing the bank were not working when I last visited the bank. One (Miss C) is the teller I often deal with at the drive-through window. The other (Miss L) is the branch manager, who refinanced my mortgage. So they both know me well as a regular customer.

Miss K handled my withdrawal and then she brought up the topic of Halloween. She said my "costume" was the best she had ever seen. Then she asked me if I had a photo on my iPhone so she could show Miss C.

Of course, I did and she called Miss C over to see my photo. Needless to say, she was floored. Then she asked Miss L if she had seen my Halloween costume photo.

Miss L replied, "No, but I heard about it."

Evidently, my costume was the talk of the bank staff. (I dress to impress!)

I showed Miss L my photo and she was amazed, too.

Floral Bell-Sleeve Dress


For what it's worth, the dress (photo right) I bought on Halloween at Dress Barn/Roz & Ali is now on their website





Source: Boston Proper
Wearing Boston Proper (Source: Boston Proper)





Arthur Chamski
Arthur Chamski femulates on an episode of Polish television's Your Face Sounds Familiar (Twoja Twarz Brzmi Znajomo).

Womanless High School

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In August, Starla, the intrepid high school yearbook explorer, sent me a batch of womanless event photos that she culled from online yearbooks. This set was lost on my hard disk until today when I heard the voice of one of the womanless participants crying out, "Post me, post me."

I did some investigating and discovered that I was not hearing things; there were a bunch of womanless photos that I failed to upload to flickr. So I corrected the error of my ways and 14 new images, like the one on the left, from womanless events of the near and distant past now reside on my flickr page where you may view them in two ways:

Method 1: Open one of the Yearbooks sets (A through Z) and you will find the newest uploads at the end/bottom of the set. (The oldest uploads appear at the beginning/top of the set.)

Method 2: Open my photostream and you will find the newest uploads at the top of page 1. The uploads get older as the page numbers get higher with the oldest uploads on the last page.

The contents of the Yearbook A through Z sets are organized according to school name, for example, the photos from Sacred Heart High School would be in the Yearbooks S set.

Stats


After I uploaded the images to flickr, I checked the statistics and was surprised that this image of me has the most views (92,070) of all the images I have uploaded to  flickr. I am surprised because in my opinion, there are better images of me to view on flickr, but the customer is always right.

The most viewed womanless image is this 1980 photo from Wolfson High School in Jacksonville, Florida, with 72,024 views. Looking at the photo, it is obvious why it is popular, but my favorite is the second most viewed (71,536) womanless image: an excellent femulation by a Texas beauty in 1981.

You All


By the way, if you participated in your school's womanless beauty pageant or attended some other school activity en femme, I would love to post your photos along with any description you would like to provide. (No one has taken me up on this offer, so far, but I am still hopeful and very patient!)




Source: Bebe
Wearing Bebe (Source: Bebe)





Eddie Cantor
Eddie Cantor femulating in the 1931 film Palmy Days.

Someday Funnies

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Source: Boston Proper
Wearing Boston Proper (Source: Boston Proper)




Rianna
Rianna femulates Liza Minelli for Halloween

My Best

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Saturday, I mentioned that my most viewed photo on flickr is not what I consider my best photo.

In response, I received an unsolicited e-mail from a long-time reader of the blog, who wrote, "Attached is my favorite photo of you. As you may recall, I prefer flaring, swishy skirts and dress bottoms. I know this is a photo of you from years ago, but I just adore the dress, your pose, and how lovely and feminine you look."

The photo in question is 22 years old, so I was in my mid-40s at the time. My makeup skills were still under development, but at that age, makeup skills were not deal-breaker. What was a deal-breaker was that I was so closeted when that photo was taken. "Youth is wasted on the young" sure applies in this case!





Source: ModCloth
Wearing ModCloth (Source: ModCloth)




Crystal
Crystal donating plasma on Halloween.

Do girdles and longline bras help?

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Over the weekend, I received a comment to my Size 14? post from Darianna. I replied to her comment with another comment, but I am expanding that reply here today.

Darianna wrote, "Lately I have become interested in dressing more classy and sophisticated. I just want to ask you, 'Does wearing a girdle and longline bra help very much? Should I buy a Rago body briefer to make slipping on a dress easier or for how it shapes my male body?'


"Thank you, I respect your opinion."


Before I answer your questions Darianna, I want to say that my reply is what works for me and your mileage may, and probably will vary.

Dresses are designed for someone who is curvy, so I wear foundation garments to give me some curves. The longline bra lifts my breasts to make them more perky and tightens the area below my breasts to narrow my waistline. The girdle also flattens my belly and narrows my waistline.

Both the bra and girdle redistribute some of my fat to add to my hips and bust. Note that my natural breasts are big for a boy and nearly fill a B cup bra without assistance.

Anyway, my foundation garments do a good job of giving me a woman's figure that currently fits in a size 14 dress... not a baggy size 14 dress, but rather a size 14 dress that clings and shows off my curves.

Another note: Going from the size 18 and 16 (my sizes for decades) to a size 14 has eliminated all my back fat, which also eliminated the Spanx cami I had to wear to smooth out my back fat.

Without foundation garments, I would have to purchase larger sizes to fit my non-curvaceous body, that is, to fit around my waistline. Problem is that the larger sizes are still designed for a curvy body, so the larger size would fit my boyish waistline, but would be too big in the bust and hips — not a look I am trying to achieve.

So for me today, a girdle and a longline bra provide the best possible femulation.

Regarding body briefers, I have found that they do not do a good job of shaping me. I need something that is not so brief in its shaping powers — something more substantial like a longline bra and girdle.

If you are new to foundation garments, I recommend getting fitted by a pro in order to get the correct sizes. Look up local lingerie stores in the Yellow Pages and feel them over the phone. Be up front and tell them you crossdress. Most are more than willing to help you out (and take your money), but occasionally you may run into a store that is not so open-minded and it is better to find that out over the phone rather than in person.

Good Luck!




Source: Dress Barn
Wearing Roz & Ali (Source: Dress Barn)




Mindy
Lovely Mindy, a regular reader of Femulate

Frankly my dears, I don't give a damn!

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I am 66 years old. On a good day, I can probably pass for 56. Either way, I am not getting any younger.

Although I have been femulating all my adult life, I have only been out of the closet for the past 11 years. As a result, I missed a lot of prime time presenting as a woman in society. I missed all those youthful years when some myopic folks might even consider me to be a woman who was "hot." ("Not hot" is more likely today.)

Chronologically, I may be a senior citizen, but in my mind, I am far from it. In my mind, I am a young woman and I plan to look like a young woman as long as possible.

Forget dressing my age. I have to make up for lost time, so short hemlines, high heels, tight dresses, and revealing necklines will continue to be part of my wardrobe for the near future.

If I look a little ridiculous not dressing my age, so be it because frankly my dears, I don't give a damn!




Source: Intermix
Wearing Alexis (Source: Intermix)




NC
NC femulated Velma for Halloween.

Michelle Rose's Story

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Dear Stana,

I just wanted to thank you and all the women who have shared their trans experiences on your blog. As for myself and the entire Femulating Sorority, we owe you a debt and our gratitude.

As a long time reader, I look forward to your postings, letters, discussions and resources on presenting with a more feminine appearance. With the information from your postings, a most accepting spouse and a decade of weight loss, I am at long last, comfortable and secure enough to venture out en femme. Well that and my wife's consent! (I'll call here "Donna," but that's not her name.)

Donna has been very accepting of my trans identification and has taught me so much about being a girl. I constantly thank her for showing me all the important "girl stuff." She introduced me to Spanx shapewear and all the other under garments necessary to achieve a more feminine figure.

Over time, following her recommendations, we have put together a pretty complete women's wardrobe. Handbags, scarves, belts, hats, sunglasses and jewelry we can share, but truth be told, she sees right through me whenever I show her the "present" I bought for her!

There were several items specific to trans girls that she was unable to help with. Following your advice, I found a local cosmetician with trans experience. She offered so many tips on shaving, color correction for hiding facial hair, a proper palette for my skin tone, facial contouring and dealing with my close set eyes. After several lessons and lots of practice, the skills necessary to use makeup correctly are now within my grasp!

Also, I located a trans-friendly wig shop. The sales woman was very accommodating and provided time for a private appointment, prior to the store opening! I left with two wigs, all the accessories necessary to style and care for the wigs and a trans-friendly ciswoman for a new friend.

To be certain, it was your confidence-building that motivated me to finally step out. So this past October, I was away on a photography shoot and used the opportunity for my first outing! It was exhilarating! I dressed simply — just a plain black skirt, awhite cotton top (with some pretty lace work on the shoulders, sleeves and cuffs), stockings and black suede pumps. I think I took almost two hours to do my makeup, wig and get dressed.

I really have a thing for silver jewelry and didn't skimp: large teardrop earrings, a chain with my favorite cat pendent (we bought that in Italy years ago), a silver watch, my mother's charm bracelet (she passed away last year) and a few rings. I prepared a set of extra large press-on nails and they worked fine for the evening.

It was so much fun putting all the necessary items in my purse: driver's license, credit and bank card, cash, room key, car key, a wig comb, lipstick and a makeup compact. All dressed up and ready to go, I took a final look in the mirror and walked out the door!

I was terrified in the hall, the elevator and out to my car! Thank the goddess that nobody else was in the elevator! The lobby was busy, but with everybody going about their business, I passed through, unnoticed.

Once outside, the evening air had cooled considerably; how wonderful it was to feel a breeze on my exposed legs. Walking slowly with my best high heel gait, I arrived at the security of my car without event. To be truthful, I was shaking just a little! Driving off, I quickly made a strategic decision and removed my left shoe. Learning to drive in heels just got added to my "to do" list.

Since I was near a national park and had paid the admission fee earlier in the day, I drove to a quiet scenic overlook. It was near twilight when I parked. Leaving the safety of my car, I walked to the overlook.

I passed several people and to my surprise and delight realized that nobody gave me second look! I felt a small, but clear sense of contentment! You see, I was 60 on my last birthday and wanted to do this since I was in my teens. And while not exactly "passing" for a woman, it seems to me, that I am not too ghastly presenting as a woman! At least not in low light and when nobody is paying attention. Oh Happy Days!

I spent  20 minutes or so just savoring the time. It was the most spectacular sunset this girl has ever witnessed! The drive in was almost an hour and since traffic can move at a brisk 35 MPH in national parks, I decided to head back.

On my to the hotel, I went through the drive-in at the local Micky D's. While the girl at the counter did refer to me as "ma'am," the look of confusion on her face was precious! Back in my room, i changed out of my attire and enjoyed a very large glass of wine with my dinner!

Thank you again. All my love,

Michelle Rose (photo below)




Michelle Rose
Michelle Rose




Source: Boston Proper
Wearing Boston Proper (Source: Boston Proper)

Underdress

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Time was of the essence on Tuesday and instead of presenting as a woman from head-to-toe, I underdressed to go shopping. Under my boy top and boy jeans, I wore a Rago longline bra and Rago high-waist long leg pantie girdle —not for the thrill of wearing woman's undies, but for practical reasons. I planned to shop at Roz & Ali (nee Dress Barn) and if I found anything that I might purchase, I wanted to try them on a female figure, not a boy body (it makes a big difference).

After notching my boy belt two notches tighter than usual and wondering if anyone would notice the two protuberances under my boy top and jacket, I started my journey with snow flurries in the air.

First stop was the Agway I visited on Halloween and left empty-handed because the cat litter I wanted was out of stock. As soon as I entered, the woman who runs the store recognized me and said that the litter had been delivered.

While I was paying for the litter, I asked the woman, "How did you like my Halloween costume?"

"You looked great! I had no idea who you were until you said you wanted litter."

Next, I shopped at Walmart and Petco and finally my favorite Roz & Ali. Walking in, I saw that the store manager was at the register dealing with a customer. I waved and she waved back.

I browsed the racks and found three items to try on. When the manager was free, she came over to me and gave me a big hug. She asked how retirement was going, then we talked about the store's name change and my job prospects. Like the assistant manager told me on Halloween, she said they had recently closed some other local Dress Barns, so they were not hiring.

I asked her to keep me in mind and that I would be willing to work as little as one day a week just to get my feet wet. She said she would keep me in mind and then opened a dressing room for me to try my finds.

All three size 14 dresses fit perfectly, which may not have been the case if I was wearing boy undies rather than a bra and girdle. Two of the three dresses were keepers and I took my purchases to the cash register where the store manager was dealing with an older gent, who was buying gift cards for the holidays.

I was standing within earshot and heard the gent say, "I feel odd making a purchase in a woman's clothing store."

The store manager said, "We have a lot of male customers."

"Crossdressers?" he asked.

The store manager just smiled and looked at me with an expression on her face that seemed to say, "Are you hearing this?"

After he finished paying for his purchase, he turned to find me standing right behind him with two dresses slung over my arm, but he did not seem to notice. I think he was anxious to leave the store quickly before somebody branded him as a crossdresser.

I moved up to counter and commented to the store manager that I should have showed the guy my photo. She laughed.

I had a couple of coupons and the two dresses (pictured above, a seamed scuba keyhole dress in wild peacock and a sequin sheath dress in navy/grey) only cost me $52 total.

The store manager gave me another hug as I left the store and I went home.

That's all I have to say about that.




Source: Boston Proper
Wearing Boston Proper (Source: Boston Proper)




Lisa
Long time Femulate reader and Fantasia Fair friend, Lisa

Awareness, Remembrance, Support and Outreach

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Aware and Remember: Mark Your Calendar

November is Transgender Awareness Month.

November 13–17 was Transgender Awareness Week. (Why are Sunday, November 12, and today, November 18, not part of Transgender Awareness Week?)

And Monday, November 20, is Transgender Day of Remembrance.

Support

When I was still in the closet, my wife urged me to find and join a support group. Via CompuServe's Genderline, I found Connecticut Outreach Society and joined it as fast as my high heels could carry me to the group's meeting place.

I owe the Society a lot because it got me out of the closet to experience the world as a woman. And the rest is her story.

All support groups are different. Some are better than others. But if you want to escape the closet, I urge you to find and join a local support group. It may do wonders for you like my support group did for me.

And if your closet is in my neck of the woods, I highly recommend Connecticut Outreach Society.   

Outreach

Over ten years ago, I got my feet wet doing outreach at Southern Connecticut State University for Professor Anna Schildroth's Human Sexuality classes. Since then, I have also done outreach at other colleges and universities, but each semester, I returned to Southern to do outreach for Anna's classes.

I usually received an e-mail in early November from Anna inviting me to her class after Thanksgiving. But I did not hear from Anna this month, so I e-mailed her only to find out that sadly, she is no longer teaching that class and my services will no longer be needed.

I will miss my outreach trips to New Haven and hope I can fill the gap someplace else.




Source: Bebe
Wearing Bebe (Source: Bebe)





Stana
Doing outreach at Southern Connecticut State University

Someday Funnies

When Nipping's Not Enough

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Dear Stana, 

I have been fitted for a Flexees waist nipper at a Lady Grace shop and I found the waist nipper did little for my waist. In your experience, does a high-waist long leg pantie girdle provide a better waist reduction than the waist nipper? I would really like a 2-inch reduction if possible and am looking for the solution. 

Any help would be most appreciated.

Katherine

👠👠👠

Until I received your e-mail, it never occurred to me that a waist nipper might not do much good for some girls.

If you are in good shape and your waistline is not bigger than it should be, using a waist nipper is like carrying coals to Newcastle: you don't have much of anything for a waist nipper to nip. And if the waist nipper doesn't do the job, a high-waist girdle probably won't make much of a difference either.

Since you can't reduce your waistline, you will have to add padding on your hips to widen them and thus, become curvy. (I assume you are already padded somehow up top.)

On the other hand, if you are not thin, then maybe you need something that will tighten up your waist better than a waist nipper. A high-waist girdle may or may not be an improvement over a waist nipper, but I am sure that a lace-up underbust corset would do the job.

I own one, wear it when I need to and it easily reduces my waistline by two inches — probably more. Although tightening the laces of a corset is normally performed by another person, I am able to tighten mine up without assistance, although it is a lot easier if someone else does the honors.





Source: Boston Proper
Wearing Boston Proper (Source: Boston Proper)




Professional femulation in the 1950's
Professional femulation in the 1950's

Snowball

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In my opinion, as more males present themselves as females in public, it encourages other males who are on the cusp to present as females, too. It is a snowball effect.

In the early 1960s, I was on the cusp. I was a feminine boy, but I had never dressed. Except for comics on television and actors in films, males dressing as females was unheard of in my little world.  Dressing as a female myself never even crossed my mind… until one Halloween.

I recall visiting my aunts' house on Halloween dressed as the Frankenstein Monster. My aunts were all aflutter about a neighborhood boy who had visited them earlier that evening dressed as a girl. He even wore stockings and high heels! Suddenly, dressing as a female myself crossed my mind.

Another Halloween, Billy, my best friend in grammar school urged me to join him trick-or-treating that year. He told me that he dressed as a girl the previous Halloween, planned to dress as a girl again this Halloween and suggested that I dress as a girl, too. I was intrigued, but as feminine as I was, I was not ready to dress as a female because I feared what people would think if I did dress up. (By the way, after adding a lot of twos and twos together, I am certain that Billy was transgender.)


About this time, I was exposed to female impersonators.

My father bought the New York Daily News every day and I noticed that at the end of the week, probably in the Thursday or Friday edition of the News, there would be a thumbnail-sized ad in the back pages of the paper that caught my eye. The ad always consisted of a photo of a gorgeous showgirl and was captioned "Who's No Lady?"

The gorgeous showgirl was no lady, but a female impersonator and the ad was for the Club 82 in New York City, a nightclub that featured female impersonators. I was amazed that males could look like the showgirls featured in those ads. I was so fascinated with the transformation that I began cutting out the ads from the newspaper and collecting them with a paperclip.

Then home alone one day, I started on a voyage that has never ended. I went to my parents' bedroom, found a pair of my my mother's nylon stockings and tried them on. This was so long ago that the stockings had seams (all stockings had seams back then) and my legs were still hairless.

After I slipped on the stockings, I opened my mother's closet to see how my legs looked in the full-length mirror hanging on the inside of the closet door. My legs still looked like my own legs except now they were covered by nylon.

Then it occurred to me that my mother's shoe collection was at my disposal inside the closet. I slipped on a pair of her high heel pumps and examined myself in the mirror again. My legs were no  longer boys' legs encased in nylon; they had been transformed into a pair of shapely legs that any woman would die for!

After that eye-opener, I experimented with my mother's girdles, bras, dresses, hats, gloves, lipstick, rouge, etc. and got caught up in a snowball that has never stopped growing.



Source: Boston Proper
Wearing Boston Proper (Source: Boston Proper)




Happy Thanksgiving!

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Transgender Thanksgiving Trivia

Did you know that Cape Cod's Provincetown Harbor is where the Pilgrims initially anchored the Mayflower in 1620 after their ocean voyage from England? (Provincetown is the site of Fantasia Fair, the longest-running transgender event of its kind in the New World.)





Source: Boston Proper
Wearing Boston Proper (Source: Boston Proper)




Ian Holm
Ian Holm (right) femulating in the British television movie The Last of the Blonde Bombshells.

Thank God I'm A Girly Boy

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I have a lot to be thankful for: my family, my friends, my health, my etcetera, etcetera. I am also thankful that I trans.

Sure being trans has its ups and downs, but it has been an interesting trip and it certainly has not been boring.

Beyond the pages of DC and Marvel Comics, not many people have a secret identity. Although I am very open about being trans today, I maintained a secret identity and compartmentalized my identities for a long time.

As you know, it is a lot of work protecting a secret identity. The close calls are too numerous to enumerate, but looking back, they have become anecdotes, often amusing anecdotes that I share here and there.

And if I wasn't trans, this blog would not exist, nor would the word "femulate." That is not a big deal. But what is a big deal are the emails I receive every week from Femulate readers thanking me for inspiring them to escape from the closet and experience life in this world as women.

Your success stories indicate that the goal of this blog is being fulfilled. Perhaps writing this blog is why God put me on this Earth as a girly boy.




Source: Pinterest
(Source: Pinterest)




Mark Stanley
Mark Stanley plays a transwoman in the 2017 British television series Loves, Lies and Records.

Grab Bag

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Kacper Kuszewski
Kacper Kuszewski femulating Diana Ross

I was a 1960s rock 'n' roller and The Supremes was one of my favorite groups from that era. Their sound epitomized Motown in the 1960s. I bought most of their 45s and some of their LPs during the group's heyday.

In addition to their music, I loved their style. The gowns they wore on their television appearances were fab and I dreamed about starting my own singing group just so I could dress like them.

One thing holding me back was my singing voice or lack thereof. It may have prevented me from performing as the lead singer of "Stana and the Starlites," but it did not prevent me from buying and wearing fabulous evening gowns. Occasionally, I even lip-synced while wearing one!

Last week, Diana Ross, former lead singer of The Supremes, won a lifetime achievement award on one of those music awards shows that pop up on television about once a month. That moved me to peruse my iTunes library to see how well The Supremes were represented. I was surprised that my library was lacking in that regard.

I had a few of their hits from some Motown compilations, but that was all, so I began shopping around to fill the gap. I ended up purchasing their album titled Gold, which contains 40 of their best songs, so that should adequately fill the gap.

Coincidentally, I found another Diana Ross femulation on YouTube: Kacper Kuszewski performing "Upside Down" on the Polish version of television's Your Face Sounds Familiar. It rivals one of my favorite Your Face Sounds Familiar femulations, Jerzy Grzechnik performing "Baby Love."

Dunno if you read the comments that readers leave on the blog, so you might have missed another excellent femulation on YouTube that Fernanda referred to a few days ago. The 1930 video in question featured professional femulator Reg Stone performing on stage for the British troops. Miss Reg is amazing! And in another video from the same show, Ravishing Reg joins a chorus line of Army gurls singing  and dancing on stage.  

Fast-forward to the 21st Century... P!nk has released a new video for her song "Beautiful Trauma." In the video, she portrays a 1950s housewife and actor Channing Tatum portrays her husband. At the 1:45 minute mark, P!nk discovers Channing crossdressing in their closet. View the video to see the gender role reversal that transpires.

By the way, this is not Channing's first time in a dress. Let me Google that for you.




Source: Bebe
Wearing Bebe (Source: Bebe)




Sebastian Muntean femulates C. C. Catch on the Romanian version of television's Your Face Sounds Familiar.

Someday Funnies

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Tony Curtis
Tony Curtis ready to femulate in the 1959 film Some Like It Hot.

Shopped ‘Til She Dropped

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Dressing Room Selfie
Dressing Room Selfie
I never get tired of shopping for women’s clothing. Browsing through the racks and finding a half-dozen outfits to take to the changing room is just as much fun today as it was when I would browse through my mother’s closet and find outfits to try on in front of her full-length mirror.

Just writing about shopping motivates me to go shopping. After all I do need something new to wear when I go to First Event (as if I don’t already have a half-dozen dresses hanging in my closet that still have their price tags attached).

Someday my tombstone will read, “Shopped ‘Til She Dropped.”

Anyway here are a few thing I learned when shopping.

👠 If a store associate is available when going to the changing room to try on your finds, play dumb and ask where the changing rooms are located. I do this whenever possible for insurance purposes, that is, if somebody complains about a dude in the lady’s dressing room, the dude can say that’s where the store associate told me to go.

👠 Take as many outfits as possible to try on when you go to the changing room. Some stores limit the number you can take in, some don’t, but in any case, go for the max in order to minimize the number of times you have to change your street clothes.

👠 Shop at smaller women’s clothing stores rather than big department stores. You won’t get a lot of hands-on assistance in large department stores, however, you usually will get assistance in smaller women’s clothing stores. For example, when you are ready to try on your finds, an associate will “start” a dressing room for you (your very own queendom) and sometimes they will even put a sign on the door reserving that room for you with your femme name emblazoned on the sign. If something is the wrong size, the associate will fetch another size to try on saving you the trouble of getting back into your street clothes to do the fetching yourself.

👠 In smaller stores, savvy associates will size you up and recommend clothing for you to try on. This has happened to me more than once and I ended up trying clothing on that looked great on me, but I would have never given a second look if the sales associate had not made the suggestion.

👠 Speaking of street clothes, wear an outfit that you can strip off and put back on easily. I own a sweater dress that has a full-length zipper in front, which is perfect for quick undressing/dressing. Jumpsuits also work well.

👠 The associates want to sell, so if they compliment you on what you try on, take the compliment with a grain of salt. If you go shopping with a friend, your friend’s compliments may not be any more valuable than the store associate’s because your friend may not want to hurt your feelings. So here is a way I get an independent appraisal of what I am trying on… I step out of the dressing room on the pretense of viewing myself in the full-length mirrors usually hung throughout the store. My goal is for another customer to see me while I am doing this. If they gush over what I am wearing, it is a bingo! Whenever I have done this, other customers always check me out while I am checking me out and if they like what they see, they let me know.

👠 For a quick self-appraisal, take a selfie or have an associate take your photo. The difference between what you “see” in a mirror and what you “see” in a photo is surprising ― trust the photo, not the mirror.

Shopping for women’s clothing is almost as much fun as wearing women’s clothing! So, you go girls and have some fun!




Source: Bebe
Wearing Bebe (Source: Bebe)




Shopping
Shopping

Kandi's Land

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As a new feature of Femulate, I plan to identify new blogs that will be of interest to femulators. The first blog to be so identified is Kandi's Land, a blog written by a Cleveland girl, who is very out and about and has the blessing of her wife to do so.

Here is a sample from Kandi's blog.

Kandi
About

I am a crossdresser! There. I said it. October 2014. Never admitted that to myself, but have always been one. Hated myself for it. It has always been a compulsion, an urge, never something I ever enjoyed. What is wrong with me? It turns out, nothing!

Okay, now what do I do? Having purged a small bedroom full of women’s clothes over the course of my 50+ years, let’s start fresh. Let’s see if I can enjoy this. Purchase a few things. Okay, I like that. Add a few more. Keep them for more that an hour, a day, a week. So far, so good. How do I feel? Different, better, happy.

I need to make some life changes. If I am going down this road, I need to look half decent. I begin the road that would result in my dropping 35 pounds and eventually becoming a very competitive runner, routinely winning my age groups comfortably in 5Ks, now winning my age group in half marathons and most recently completing my first full marathon. Happiness matters.

So now I am getting slimmer, getting in good shape, happy with myself. But the big hurdle remains. I am very happily married with two grown and successful daughters. It took well over a month to gather the courage to tell my wife. December 2, 2014 is the day. If she is not on board, this all stops, no questions asked. And I would completely understand her not being happy with it. I find the words, show her my painted toenails, tell her how it all makes me happy. In a moment I will never forget, she says she just wants me to be happy. You know that feeling when you fall in love with someone? I did that all over again, almost 30 years into our marriage. I was immediately transformed. My life is still filled with ups and downs, but my “default” mood is always one of happiness. My smile, previously buried under a crappy mustache and displayed only when made happy (instead of being happy) by family and friends, became ever present. Now what do I do? What have I done!!!!

The work begins. Removing more body hair than your average polar bear. Developing those routines that women do, not men. Moisturizing. Frequent shaving. Now do I really want to do this? I begin purchasing items to be included in my wardrobe. I have no fear of buying women’s clothing as a man. None. A bra fitting? Why not. A new dress? Of course.

I schedule a makeover at Janet’s Closet in Detroit. I need to see what I would look like. Not bad. To paraphrase Rudolph (the Red Nosed Reindeer)….I’m cute!!!!! Or at least not hideous. I let the girls there talk me into wearing clothing I would never dream of wearing now and I make a walk through the mall. I survive (although read by some teenage girls). I go out with some seasoned “girls” (I hate the term “gurls”). I survive! Now the real work begins. How do I build a real life for Kandi. She is not simply going to hang out at CD bars and shop, shop, shop (although she does a lot of that).

My hope is that this blog can show you how to make your life a happy one if you are a crossdresser.  I completely understand I am very different than a transgendered woman. Apples and oranges.

My world view is one of extreme optimism. The world is so much better than the media would make you believe. No question, we live in troubled times. But I have now been out probably 300 times. I am frequently complemented, have received more hugs from total strangers than one can count, had drinks and meals purchased for me and am an active member of a church, many charitable organizations and even a woman’s social group. I also understand that I have the blessing of my wife, a HUGE benefit to my being able to achieve that happiness. Come on along for the ride!

Come visit the Kandi archives, pictures and stories of every time out: https://www.flickr.com/photos/131254150@N06/


Source: Eloquii
Wearing Eloquii (Source: Eloquii)



Tyler Grant
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